6 ways that Men can Immediately Upgrade their Lifestyle to Attract Better Relationships by Laura Yates

6 ways that Men can Immediately Upgrade their Lifestyle to Attract Better Relationships by Laura Yates

When it comes to dating and trying to find a relationship, I think we can often place our ‘life’ and ‘dating life’ into two separate categories. What’s so important to recognise though, is that the quality of your relationships and the ones you attract are usually a direct result of what’s going on behind the scenes of your lifestyle. And when it comes to dating or finding a fulfilling relationship, you want to be in a position where you have choice. Where you are connecting with a variety of women so that you’re not settling for the first one who shows interest just because you don’t have much else going on. So, here are 6 ways that you can ‘upgrade’ your lifestyle to attract better relationships. And by the way, this applies to all types of relationships be it friendships, work, social and so on. And don’t be misled by the word upgrade either! It’s definitely not about throwing cash at the situation. 1) Be interesting. So get interested Women are attracted to interesting men. It doesn’t really matter what this is (as long as it isn’t anything weird or creepy!), but men who show passion or at least a keen interest for something are incredibly magnetic. To be interesting though, you need to get interested. Be curious. Start spending more time on the things that make you tick. Instead of coming home from work and watching the same TV shows all evening (which doesn’t make for great social/dating conversations), start indulging in the things that you are interested in and explore them more. Or try new things. Depending... read more
You Are Too Immature For A Non-Exclusive Relationship

You Are Too Immature For A Non-Exclusive Relationship

A lot of people, male and female, are attracted to the idea of a non-exclusive relationship. And when presented with the opportunity, they jump for joy, thinking that it is carte blanche to do whatever they want. They may start checking out, flirting, texting or talking on the phone with other people right in front of the person that they are dating or otherwise doing “stuff” with. They seem to mistake lack of exclusivity with lack of rules. But there are rules. They are known as respect, discretion and empathy. It is sad that I have to write about this but observation has demonstrated that I do. When you go out with a friend, acquaintance or colleague, you don’t just ditch them in favor of socializing with who ever happens to be around. I hope. It is suffice to say that doing so would be disrespectful to the other person and that they would cut you out of their life pretty quickly for such behavior. Hopefully you possess enough self-respect to not put up with that kind of crap either. Why some people think that the same basic courtesy does not apply in a non-exclusive relationship (whether romantic or sexual) baffles me. Just because somebody has consented to seeing other people does not in any way suggest that they agreed to be disrespected. It does not matter if you are in an open relationship, casually dating or in a friends with benefits arrangement. Respect, discretion and empathy are the minimum that you should be extending to any person that you come into contact with. So if you are in... read more
Stop “Opening” Women

Stop “Opening” Women

Ever since Neil Strauss published The Game, guys have been obsessed with “opening” (i.e. approaching) women. They started running around bars, streets and shopping malls, approaching as many women as they could find the courage for and then bragging about it to their wingmen. Some guys will “open” 10, 15 or even 20 women in a single night. When a guy brags about how many women he approached, I take it to mean that he doesn’t actually know how to talk to them. If he approached a dozen or more girls in a single outing, what kind of interaction do you suppose he had with any of them? Chances are that he either got blown out shortly after striking up conversation or got too scared to lead the interaction past the initial small talk and ran off. A guy who actually knows how to talk to a woman will not need to approach a dozen of them in a single outing. Instead, he will find one or two, engage her in conversation, build attraction and establish a connection. By the end of the interaction, he will either leave with the girl or leave her wanting more. It is the difference between a sniper and a blind man with a machine gun. A sniper will get the kill without collateral damage while the blind man with a machine gun will shoot up the place and still miss the target. So next time you decide to meet some women, instead of running around and annoying a whole bunch of them, focus on creating quality interactions instead. Try to get to know... read more
Two Reasons Why I Love Getting Rejected

Two Reasons Why I Love Getting Rejected

If you read my post on how to avoid rejection, you will remember that I actually advised you not do it. That is because if you are not getting rejected, you are playing it safe and therefore not reaching your potential. There are a number of reason why I love rejection. Here are my top two: Rejection is Liberating Fear is a state of worry over a potential outcome. It is a useful emotion when there is risk of an outcome that may be harmful. Like getting mauled by a bear on a camping trip. In this case fear guides you take wise precautions; like packing bear spray for instance. However, irrational fears do not serve you, they cripple you. Fear of rejection by a woman is an irrational fear. And the only way to rid yourself of it is to face it. The reward for facing an irrational fear is liberation. When you get rejected and realize that its impact is inconsequential to your well-being, fear of rejection loses its hold over you, thereby releasing you from constraints. If you’d like to hear an inspiring story of one man’s triumph over a debilitating fear of rejection, check out episode 2 of the Men’s Dating Mastery Podcast, with Jason Comely. Or if you feel the need to take a really deep dive into this then I recommend a book called “Feel The Fear and Do it Anyway” by Dr. Susuan Jeffers, which I recommend. Failure is Feedback Once you learn to embrace rejection, you can begin to use it to your advantage. Let’s use a basketball analogy. You can watch the... read more
You Are Your Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

You Are Your Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

I am writing this as I a wrap up a vacation in Miami where I got to spend time with two girls who could not be more different from each other. This reminded me of a recurring concept that I originally learned in business school. That is the concept of the self-fulfilling prophecy. Girl one was into her late thirties while girl two was an undergrad student in her early twenties. The three of us spent our last night partying it up at a club with a Latin flavor and a younger crowd. In this setting, if you knew nothing else about these two women, you would expect girl one to be completely out of place. She may conjure up images of a lonely woman, looking for companionship in the wrong place. On the other hand, you would expect girl two to fit right in. Yet reality was the exact opposite. You see, girl one was confident, very social and had a positive outlook on everything and everyone around her. So much that I almost started to question her sanity. Girl two on the other hand was introverted, shy and very self-conscious; she kept going on about how out of place she felt. So in the club, girl one was dancing up a storm, chatting it up and laughing with everyone around her, and drawing the attention of men. Girl two wall-flowered and went largely unnoticed, except by me, who after too many attempts to loosen her up was left with the impression that she was kind of socially awkward. I know what you’re wondering, so to answer your question: their... read more

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