If you read my post on how to avoid rejection, you will remember that I actually advised you not do it. That is because if you are not getting rejected, you are playing it safe and therefore not reaching your potential. There are a number of reason why I love rejection. Here are my top two:
Rejection is Liberating
Fear is a state of worry over a potential outcome. It is a useful emotion when there is risk of an outcome that may be harmful. Like getting mauled by a bear on a camping trip. In this case fear guides you take wise precautions; like packing bear spray for instance. However, irrational fears do not serve you, they cripple you. Fear of rejection by a woman is an irrational fear. And the only way to rid yourself of it is to face it.
The reward for facing an irrational fear is liberation. When you get rejected and realize that its impact is inconsequential to your well-being, fear of rejection loses its hold over you, thereby releasing you from constraints. If you’d like to hear an inspiring story of one man’s triumph over a debilitating fear of rejection, check out episode 2 of the Men’s Dating Mastery Podcast, with Jason Comely. Or if you feel the need to take a really deep dive into this then I recommend a book called “Feel The Fear and Do it Anyway” by Dr. Susuan Jeffers, which I recommend.
Failure is Feedback
Once you learn to embrace rejection, you can begin to use it to your advantage.
Let’s use a basketball analogy. You can watch the NBA and read all about basketball. But until you pick up the ball and take a shot on net, you will not know how to play. And the odds of you missing your first shot are almost guaranteed. However, it is that miss that allows you to adjust your throw. With every shot, you adjust the angle, force, spin and curve that you apply to the ball. You will have a bunch of consecutive misses and sometimes it may seem like you are actually getting farther away from net. But each miss provides you with the necessary feedback that finally gets you that swish.
You cannot have success without failure. You need failure in order to know which way to steer your ship.
I’ll leave the final words to Michael Jordan:
“I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”